This can’t be help, can this?

Honestly as a romantic person, I have a lot of expectations. When they’re not met, I have tantrums. Now that I think I am more mature in handling relationships, I shrug the issue off when my expectations are not met; I would talk to myself and would make myself understand that not all people cannot do my will.

But when it comes to being depressed…

I am a person who drowns myself to sadness alone. Though it seems unnecessary, I would say sorry to the person I would tell my problems to. It feels real bad to enter someone’s peaceful life, cry to him/her and rant all you want not knowing that the disturbance you make contributes to the mood of his/her day.

But why when…

I have a lot of things in mind. A lot. Why am I like this? Is the issue of maturity really related to age and gender? Am I the one at fault? Is the thing I ask for that hard to give? Is it really gone? Am I the one to let go first? Is it okay to be selfless yet stupid just like before?

Can I do this?

I feel like crying when I think if the past. Sometimes, I wish I were numb; that I care less on the people that come and go in my life; that I do not know how to love the people around me.

And when I think that once I knelt and begged to be loved, I feel like crying… Just like this moment.

What are your thoughts?

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